Tuesday, October 30, 2012

Happy Birthday Little Buddy!!!!

Yesterday, Three years ago (!)  I looked like this:



And then this happened: 

 (go on, be jealous of my labor face.)
(good thing I had that headband!)


And Weston looked like this:

Even though his head was a little wonky, I still loved him. 

I sound so cliche saying it, but I never knew how much such a "tiny" (at 8 lbs 10 oz) little boy could change my life. Despite being stubborn, defiant and at times pretty whiney, this guy has such a calming spirit to him. He has helped me be less dramatic (since there's only room for his drama at our house), has helped me be more patient, loving, grateful and easy going than I ever could have imagined.  Either that, or I'm going insane and only in my delirium I think these things have happened. Not to mention he has taught me all things boy, which were all foreign to me before, such as truck noises, Ninja Turtles, scary growls, 

Anyway, now, Weston looks like this: 


Clearly, he looks just like me and gets all his good looks from his mother.

Next year we will tattoo that same design on his face permanently, since he freaked out so much about washing it off in the tub that night. Parenting fail? I think not.

Some of my favorite things about this kid:

* Every night he likes me to "read" him stories from my head while we lay in his (my) bed (that he has taken over). He likes books, but prefers me to just tell him stories. Have you noticed how many fairy tales have threes in them? The three little pigs, the three bears, the three billy goats gruff... those are some of his favorites. Although, right now, he's totally on a Snow White kick. He thinks the Hunstman is awesome.  Anyway... When I'm finished with the story and say "the end" he always says "no Mom, there's more pages". 

* Speaking of fairy tales... We went to the Pumpkin Patch to pick out pumpkins a few weeks ago. They had a giant straw 'pyramid'. I asked Weston if he wanted to go climb in the straw. He looked at me and asked, "The big bad wolf is not going to blow it away?"

* His daycare provider speaks Spanish. When I pick him up, I notice that she will sometimes instruct him in Spanish, and he quickly obliges (come here, go get your shoes, drink your milk, see you later, that kind of thing). However, if I ever say the same thing to him in Spanish at home, he looks at me, and slowly and loudly says: "MOM- I - DO - NOT - UNDERSTAND - YOUR - TALKING". Oh, really?

* He has a favorite blanket -- his "Debbie", which he carries around with him everywhere. It was crocheted by a dear friend's mother, Debbie, hence the name. He always has to put his fingers through the holes in the blanket, and a while ago, made a giant hole in the blanket for his hand to fit through. Before the whole blanket disintegrated, I asked Debbie if she would be so kind to make a new one, which she obliged. In the meantime, Weston's "Auntie Nana" (Josh's Aunt Merilyn from N.Z.) fixed the hole in his Debbie. On Sunday, he opened his "Debbie #2" and squealed with delight that now he has "TWO DEBBIES" and is now inseparable from both of them. 

* This kid is a singer (Hallelujah!!!!). He matches pitch, LOVES music, and is already better than David Archuleta. True story. He loves to learn new songs, and if I start singing a new song or nursery rhyme, he makes me repeat it OVER and OVER and OVER and OVER again until he has memorized the words. (remember that part about him teaching me patience?) Just the other day, we were driving in the car and he asked Josh if we could listen to Ellie Goulding. I have no idea where he learned that from, but I DIED of his cuteness!

* Usually in the dark, Weston grabs my hand, or cling to me, and then say "don't worry mom, I'll keep you safe!"

* When I do his hair in the morning, he always wants to look at it, and I always say, "oh, you're so handsome!" One morning, dropping him off at daycare, the wind was blowing. He got pretty upset, and said "The wind is going to mess up my handsome!" He constantly has to know that his 'handsome' isn't ruined.... Even though his hair DOES NOT EVER stay neatly in place. I love his mop head, anyway.

I don't know how 3 years goes by so quickly, but I'm wondering if I can find passage to Neverland? My wrinkles and his size 10 feet don't want to keep growing!

Tuesday, August 28, 2012

A Few Things

A Few Things About Running:

1. - I ran the Top of Utah Half Marathon on Saturday. Personal best of 2:00:14. (REALLY? I should have been able to shave off those 14 seconds. Fail.)
2. - I make awesome faces when i run. 

3. - I also make awesome hand actions as I run. Right now I was trying to get everyone to quit it with the standing ovation they were giving me and everything.  

4. - My legs still look weird . Maybe I should just wear pants from now on. Sheesh.

5. Yes, I stole this photo. 

Want more proof of my awesome faces? Here.

Sometimes Weston wakes up in the night with nightmares. I imagine he is dreaming of something less terrifying than this face. 

My awesome friend Sara (next to me in pink -- if you didn't already know who she is) was my life coach on this race. I can't wait to run another one with her!

Monday, July 30, 2012

Olympics!

If only my parents would have pushed me to tap into my crazy talent when I was younger, I would have been a star athlete already! Don't believe me? I totally took dance/gymnastics for a few weeks when I was a kid and I OWNED it.  I also owned the feathery puff bangs. And the farmer's tan.



Aw, I was the cutest little girl ever. Sadly, I was turned down for olympic training because of my giant feet. (Yeah, look at those things!!!) And, I was probably already over 4 feet tall. They will have none of that in the Olympics.

Now??? If they had an olympic event that was all about owning the 9 minute mile, I'd be all over that. Sigh.

My only goal as a parent is to foster my son's athletic ability so that I can ride the gravy train. I put it in his birth contract (what, you didn't make your infant sign one in blood when they were born?) that when he is rich he will buy me a vacation home on my own private island.  Being an olympic athlete may be one way to get there.

So far, he's only demonstrated potential at commanding water: (seriously, Sorcerer's Apprentice, anyone?)


I hope they can make this into a sport, so that he can support my lifestyle.

Monday, July 09, 2012

what is wrong with my LEG?



Remember how I "run"? Yeah, I'm still doing that. I'm still love/hating it. 

LOVE:
My running buddy and friend - Whitney. She has seriously changed my life in more ways than just running. I love you, Whitney.

My new Garmin. I sometimes feel like I love it as much as a child. It's so wonderful and has changed my life as well.

Not peeing my pants when I run. It's a blessing that I thank the heavens above each time I finish a run.

My yellow shoelaces. They are good luck.

HATE:
RUNNING IN THE HEAT! It is my personal hell. Children run and hide when they see my salty red face coming.

My toes. And they hate me back. I want them to be friends with running but they aren't. Ever had a nail driven through your toe? That's what it feels like when I run. And I know what that feels like since I once got a nail [and an entire board] stuck in my foot in high school.


On the 4th I did my first ever 10k -- in Riverton. It went along part of the course from the 1/2 I did in March. I really loved it. I loved the distance. But it was hot, and I had just had the flu for 2 days before. Also, I woke up at 6:47. I was supposed to leave to get to the race at 6:45. Whitney is part race car driver and we made it in time, for which I am grateful. Although I was in no means super speedy, I finished 3rd place in my age division! (58:11 -- like a 9:20 pace) Apparently everyone else was slow, too. (Like my boss says -- you don't have to outrun the bear, you just have to run faster than the person behind you.)

And if anyone can tell me what is wrong with my leg, that would be great.


(Actually, don't tell me. I know it is just my cellulite rippling along as I go. Gag.)

Monday, July 02, 2012

A Child's Love


Because a marriage isn't healthy without a little competition, Josh and I continually sometimes vie for Weston's love and affection. I clearly had the lead from the beginning, with the whole child-birth thing, and not to mention the whole supplying-the-food for the first year thing... But then, I don't know what happened. I think Josh bribes Weston while I am asleep or something. Because, it's not even a close race -- Weston LOOOVES his daddy. 




Me? Not so much.

Aw, crap. Mom fail.

Wednesday, June 06, 2012

Isn't this a breakthrough, that I'm a sailor? I sail? I sail now? 
-- What About Bob



I don't know why this wasn't on my 30 before 30 list -- because it should have been. I think I'll trade it for one of the hard ones -- like not eating sugar for a month. People really do that? I don't think so.


On Saturday, my fabulous m-i-l invited me to go sailing (if it's something you want to do, check it out here -- they do it every year for free.




This was our boat - Cairos. She is a beauty.

Granted we had no wind for the first hour and a half -- and it was 200 degrees outside, this was still one of the most fun things I have done in a long time. See? Here I am having fun.

I swear, that's my having fun face.


I'm not just showing off my awesome neck in this picture. I am checking out the "chickens" on the top of the sail as I steer the boat. (Not sure if there is a technical term for 'steering?' I fell asleep during that part of the intro.) Also in this picture -- Nancy, on the left, and LeRoy on the right -- it was his boat. And he is hilarious.


who knew the GSL was so beautiful? Not that I wanted to jump in and go swimming or anything, but still...


this is my crazy kiwi m-i-l. She was a pro at driving.


All I am missing here is a sweater tied around my shoulders. Eh? Eh?


Here's another boat out on the lake. We were bigger and better and we rubbed it in their faces as we sailed by.


And now that I have all the connections with the yacht club, I will for sure be doing this again this year, hopefully with my boys! Come with me!!! 

Um, also, does anyone else watch the Bachelorette? (What? you're too good for awesome t.v.?) Yeah, watching those boys do those sailing races, I was like "yeah, I could do that one handed in my sleep". Word.






Tuesday, May 29, 2012

A good week

I love May.  Mother's day, our anniversary and my birthday all happen in May -- which means I can be selfish and spoiled the entire month. What, doesn't everybody? Moving on. In no particular order, here are pictures from my week and weekend for your enjoyment.

This kid LOVES the swings. Almost as much as he loves the train.

In true "Jack Handey" fashion (have you ever read his deep thoughts? The one about Disneyland?) we failed as parents -- a we got him all excited to ride Trax to feed the ducks (at Gardner Village) only to realize the train was not running on Memorial Day. He cried, and cried. So we took him to a park instead.


Josh is ALWAYS serious -- see? Geez, relax and have fun a little, will ya? 


Josh likes to take out-of-focus pictures of me. This one was the least out-of-focus, and shows off my giant rear end. A win-win in my book.


 My face just looks like that most of the time. It's a hot look this summer.


Also a hot look this summer -- static-cling slide hair.


ah crap, he's turning into the hulk. I hope he doesn't rip his shirt, that thing probably cost me $3.


I love my sister -- despite the embarrassing birthday presents and steamy romance novels she gives me.  I also love her baby belly.

My 9 year old sister is getting married? I don't know how these things happen. Yes, I'll go ahead and take all the credit for her beauty.


Monday, May 21, 2012

6 years!


If Josh and I hadn't already won the award for best couple ever, cutest child ever, America's best fans ever, and even best chicken pillow recipe ever, we'd also be winning an award for most exciting date nights ever. However those people that hand out the awards just won't give us any more! We don't have a place for it in our very full trophy room, anyway.

Friday was our 6th anniversary! Sure, time flies but at the same time, I don't even think I can remember way back to our wedding day. That's asking too much of me in my geriatric old age (especially after tomorrow, which is my 98th birthday. Yes, I guess i do look good for my age) So, since it was our anniversary, we decided to change out of our pajamas and do something extra exciting! Our anniversary started out like this:

Josh should also win awards for picking out the prettiest flower arrangements for me, like all.the.time. But, alas, he has already won too many awards, remember?

That night we went to our yearly romantic dinner to Market Street Grill, because we are fancy like that. And to maintain with the fanciness of the evening, we headed across the street for some battle-to-the-death mini golf. If you didn't know this about Josh and I, we like to wager everything. Like, I bet him ridiculous amounts of money if he can eat a piece of pineapple (his mortal enemy) and he bets me our unborn children that I can't get a hole in one golfing right-handed (I'm a lefty, if you didn't know... it's what makes me cool). Josh plays to win -- and I lost, bad. But once I threw a public tantrum, including kicking my feet and throwing things at other people's heads, he did not make me shave my head. Phew.

So what if we were out of things to do by 9:00? We picked up Weston, went home and I fell asleep by 9:30. I know, you can't handle the romance!!!

Have you ever seen anything cuter than us, besides little baby ducklings???

Note: All of these INCREDIBLE photos were taken with my phone. I know, it's a shame that my self-portrait isn't of better quality. Sniff.

Because of my job, I just so happen to be an expert on divorce. BUT because I'm married to Josh, I also happen to be quite the expert on marriage. Here are just a few things I've learned in the very lengthy 6 years I've been married:

* It is not a vacation unless a beach is involved. Don't even try to go somewhere like Jackson Hole, or Ohio.  No palm trees? No vacation.

* Going on vacation means surgery. So, if Josh wants to spend time lying on the beach, he also has to sacrifice a body part. Good thing he has a lot of extra fingers and toes.

* "cooking dinner" does translate to include a big bowl of cereal.

* Cereal included, I am the world's best chef.

* Winning an argument isn't about "winning". It's about keeping points and holding grudges forever. What, you don't do this? It's totally healthy.

* Really cool people like Josh don't get embarrassed. So don't even try to embarrass him -- or you just will end up embarrassing yourself, and then going home and curling up in a corner, rocking back and forth.

* I have not learned anything else in my 6 years of marriage. That is it. I think I've been sleeping the rest of the time.

 Don't worry, I'll write a book about all of this -- and when I make millions off my sound marriage advice, I'll buy you a car. Probably a convertible, even.


Monday, April 16, 2012


Today is one of those days where I sit here, stressed about everything I have to get done this week (before we live for DIS-NEY-LAND!!! HOLLA!!!!) so instead of doing any of it... I am sitting here feeling pathetic. And eating waaaaay more than I should. 

So remember how I had another 1/2 marathon in March? Well, I did. It was hard. But, I knocked off 4 minutes from my previous time, despite the wind and my utter suckiness at the end -- and finished in 2:07. Here is proof of my awesomeness:


Confession: these photos were taken (by Whitney's dad, who was the best cheerleader ever) during the first 4 miles of the race, when I had not given up on life yet. Being very thoughtful of your eyes, and being vehemently opposed to all things horrendous, I am not going to post any pictures after this point because... well, I look like a dead, jiggly piece of trash. Poor Whitney's dad, having to document that on [digital] film.
Side note: one day I will have legs like my running buddy, Whitney (next to me).

Since running day, (well, really before -- for quite a few months) I have been having problems with the toes on my right foot. My foot has caused me to become BFF with my podiatrist, who gave me a cortisone shot in my foot last week without giving me adequate time to prepare mentally. If I had not already died in the race, I died again when I got this shot.  I have not run since I got this shot because I was so traumatized, so here's to hoping he has fixed my foot...

Remember how clear at the beginning of this post I said we're going to Disneyland??? I'm really excited. This week is going to be really long.


Ooh, ooh, so here's one more thing off my 30 before 30 list: my dearest Grandma Snazzy is teaching me to crochet! My first 'lesson' was yesterday, and let's just say I didn't do so well.  I'm wondering if I got into some paint chips when I was young, since, between the way I look when I run, and the way I struggle crocheting.... 




Thursday, February 09, 2012

Dear Future Girlfriends

DEAR  PARENTS OF [WESTON'S FUTURE GIRLFRIEND(S)]:
I hereby Solemnly Swear to teach my son to keep his tongue in his mouth before he is of dating age. 


Anyone else out there with waggly-tongued toddlers?

I know everyone has missed me dreadfully, and honestly I have MISSED blogging. This is what I have been doing instead:

*I did in fact run my 1/2 marathon on October 15th (2011 -- how embarrassed am I that I did not put that down?) I beat my goal by 19 minutes!!! Wahoo! It was the hardest thing I have ever done.... Yet, I have signed up to do another one on March 31st. What is wrong with me? Training in the winter sucks. I thought I couldn't get much worse-looking than when I run, since my face turns bright red.  But that was before I started running in the cold. Frozen snot, frozen sweat, and still red-faced. Children run and hide when they see me coming. 

*Weston turned 13. Wait, is that right? It's so hard to keep track of these days.

*Then we had Thanksgiving, Christmas, and 'winter' blah's. Ice cream is the only thing that gets me through.

*My newest nephew, Liam was born on January 29th. I died from his cuteness. It took me a week of eating ice cream to recover. Also, he has already spoken his first words (I know, at only a week old, he is advanced!) They were "Becca is my favorite". Common first phrase among newborns, I know.

*Really, I don't eat that much ice cream. I wish I did, though.